So, I’ve working on adding in all my old bras from my log, writing/editing my reviews, and condensing down the photos I have as they are too big to upload without a major lag and headache.
This is a time consuming project, and I must admit, I’ve been trying to avoid it, while forcing the effort to add at least a ... few brands from my log each week.
As I went through my log, I did skip certain brands (too many bras for those brands to deal with at the moment) but now I’m getting down to those again and realizing I can’t skip them forever.
This brings me to the realization and acceptance of just how much of an idiot I was a year ago. I was so delusional of what size I needed, so naïve to the UK vs EU sizing systems….. I was in denial of what size I really needed, plus I had difficulty accepting my new growth, and the idea of any “cup” labeled above a K seemed really too big in my brain. I did not understand why the EU J-K cup didn’t work, figuring it must just be a shape/style mismatch…….so a year later, I feel like such an idiot as I revamp my original reviews and notes, especially with the Gaia bras. I really loved the patterns and styles, and so wanted them to work for me!
The really sad thing is, that even now, with my ability to “see” fit issues for what they are, and to ascertain the difference between two sizes that seemingly fit a bit better, I still find myself trying to justify the smaller cup as fitting. I look at the photos, I look in the mirror, and I still see my breasts as being the same size they were 2 years ago…. 10 years ago. They don’t look any larger to me, even if the bras and tape measure tell me otherwise.
I don’t know if it is because I was a 32G for more than 10 years, or because I still suffer from my pre-implant taunting traumas from 15+ years ago, but I still have difficulties seeing my breasts as being large, let alone larger.
I try to bury myself in the math of it all, focusing on the numbers and data/statistics/details instead of the “sizes” behind them, but when I read my notes and reviews from a year ago (Gaia especially), it really makes me cringe at how much of a delusional idiot I sounded(sound) like. You’d figure after 44 years, I’d be a bit smarter than that………….
Does anyone else go through these thoughts and issues?
I am currently working on my Gaia reviews and photos (so glad I did not do Bra on Photos of these….eeek) and will start adding them in within the next day or so but had to take a break and voice my stupidity. I know that even if no one comments, someone reading it has to feel the same, and hopefully my pain with bring them some comfort.
Shared on Jun 20, 2018 Flag this